Joseph and Nephi

Is it a good idea to tell your older brothers that they will bow down to you?

Maybe it’s harmless, depending on the brothers. In Joseph’s case, it was catastrophic. His brothers already hated him because his father clearly favored him. But a prediction that he would rule over them was too much. Even his father objected to a dream in which “the sun and the moon and the eleven stars” bowed down to him (Genesis 37:10).

There is no excuse for the violence his brothers did to him. However obnoxious they thought he was, they were family, and they were older than him. If they “supposed [him] to be deluded,” they might have “endeavored in a proper and affectionate manner to have reclaimed [him]” (Joseph Smith—History 1:28). Instead, they allowed their envy to fuel their hatred (Genesis 37:8, 11). They stripped him of his coat, threw him into a pit, discussed the possibility of murdering him, and finally sold him into slavery (Genesis 37:23-28).

There are strong parallels between this story and Nephi, the first author in the Book of Mormon. His older brothers, Laman and Lemuel, seemed to constantly hold a grudge against him. He may not have told them that God had promised to make him “a ruler and a teacher” over them, but an angel conveyed that message to them (1 Nephi 2:22; 1 Nephi 3:29). Several times they bound him, perhaps assuming that a display of physical dominance would solve the problem. More than once, they threatened to kill him (1 Nephi 7:16; 16:37; 2 Nephi 5:2).

It’s tempting to ask what Joseph and Nephi could have done differently, but that’s likely the wrong question. The rage they elicited from their older brothers was more about the older brothers than it was about them. Lehi explained to Laman and Lemuel that Nephi was a scapegoat for their own feelings of guilt:

Ye say that he hath used sharpness; ye say that he hath been angry with you; but behold, his sharpness was the sharpness of the power of the word of God, which was in him; and that which ye call anger was the truth, according to that which is in God, which he could not restrain, manifesting boldly concerning your iniquities.

2 Nephi 1:26

Joseph’s story ended happily, with joyful reconciliation (Genesis 45:1-15). Nephi longed for a similar outcome. But such was not to be. Their new home in the Americas was undeveloped. There was no Potiphar, no prison-keeper, no Pharaoh to recognize his gifts and trust his integrity. He was not in a position to save his brothers. All he could do was separate himself from them and find happiness in another place (2 Nephi 5:5, 27). But I wonder if that’s the end of the story. Perhaps a reconciliation has since taken place. It is certainly possible that the rift in Lehi’s family has by now been repaired.

Nephi’s brother Jacob said that true saints “[endure] the crosses of the world” and “[despise] the shame of it” (2 Nephi 9:18). Perhaps that means that they resent the shame, but I think it means something more intrepid—intentionally ignoring the condemnation (see Hebrews 12:2). As Nephi observed about his father’s dream, those who partook of the fruit of the tree of life were mocked by those in the building, “but we heeded them not.” Then, he added, “for as many as heeded them, had fallen away” (1 Nephi 8:33-34).

This, then, is the message of Joseph’s and Nephi’s stories. Don’t be cowed by peer pressure. Don’t let other people’s negativity drag you down. When you’re really trying to do what’s right, you may come across as self-righteous or condescending sometimes. That may be more about the insecurities of your critics than about your own deficiencies. Don’t let them knock you off course. Keep moving forward, following the path that leads to happiness and hoping for reconciliation.

Today, I will move forward in faith, giving grace to those who may react badly to my efforts without letting them discourage or dissuade me. I will trust that strained relationships can heal over time.