Absalom

The name Absalom (אַבְשָׁלוֹם) means “father of peace.” King David’s son Absalom did not live up to his name. Far from it.

From the time he murdered his half-brother, Amnon, until he led an enormous army against his father, Absalom was constantly disrupting his father’s kingdom, destroying the peace his father was trying to establish.

But what was David’s response? As Absalom became more arrogant and ruthless, David became more humble and merciful, not only toward his son but toward all those he led. When a relative of Saul named Shimei shouted insults and even threw rocks at him, David said, “Let him alone, and let him curse; … It may be that the Lord will look on mine affliction, and that the Lord will requite me good for his cursing this day” (2 Samuel 16:11-12). When Saul’s grandson Mephibosheth was accused of trying to claim the throne for himself, David responded with restraint and kindness (2 Samuel 19:24-30). And even though Absalom worked tirelessly to turn the people against him, occupied his house, and pursued him with an army, David instructed his chief captains, “Deal gently for my sake with the young man, even with Absalom,” and all the people heard him say it (2 Samuel 18:5). When Absalom was killed, David mourned aloud:

O my son Absalom,
my son,
my son Absalom!
would God I had died for thee,
O Absalom,
my son,
my son!

2 Samuel 18:33

The Book of Mormon prophet Alma felt the same tenderness toward a son who had wronged him. Corianton accompanied him and a group of other missionaries to preach the gospel to the Zoramites in the land of Antionum. But while Alma and the others labored to teach, Corianton “[forsook] the ministry, and did go over into the land of Siron among the borders of the Lamanites, after the harlot Isabel” (Alma 39:3). This defiance of his father’s teachings became common knowledge, and it undercut Alma’s mission. “Behold, O my son,” he later said, “how great iniquity ye brought upon the Zoramites; for when they saw your conduct they would not believe in my words” (Alma 39:11).

But rather than disown or punish his son, Alma taught him. He identified four questions Corianton had struggled with, and he provided instruction to help Corianton understand better, believing that improved behavior would follow improved understanding (Alma 39:17; 40:1; 41:1; 42:1). After the explanation, he offered words of admonition and encouragement:

And now, my son, I desire that ye should let these things trouble you no more, and only let your sins trouble you, with that trouble which shall bring you down unto repentance. …
And now, O my son, ye are called of God to preach the word unto this people. And now, my son, go thy way, declare the word with truth and soberness, that thou mayest bring souls unto repentance.

Alma 42:29, 31

These are the words of a father who loves his son and wants the very best for him regardless of his son’s missteps and regardless of the harm those missteps have caused him personally.

Today I will follow the examples of David and Alma in loving those who are closest to me even when they make wrong choices. I will echo David’s longing to suffer on their behalf. Like Alma, I will speak words of hope.