Degrees of Difficulty: Controlling What We Can

A few years ago, I met with one of my mentors in New York City. He had previously been my manager and knew a lot about my organization. I shared with him what was going well in my new job and what wasn’t. After listening, he surprised me with the following response: “It sounds like the things you can control are in good shape, and the things that are problematic are out of your control—so what’s the problem?” I realized that I hadn’t factored the limits of my influence into my own self-evaluation.

In January 1836, Joseph Smith was participating in priesthood ordinances in the yet-to-be-dedicated temple in Kirtland, Ohio, when he saw a vision of the Celestial Kingdom. He saw ancient prophets there, as well as his still-living parents, which told him the vision depicted a future scene. He was surprised to see his brother Alvin there, who had died before the restoration of the priesthood and who had not been baptized. Knowing that baptism is required for exaltation, he wondered how that was possible. In response, the Lord taught him an important principle about how He judges us:

All who have died without a knowledge of this gospel, who would have received it if they had been permitted to tarry, shall be heirs of the celestial kingdom of God;

Also all that shall die henceforth without a knowledge of it, who would have received it with all their hearts, shall be heirs of that kingdom;

For I, the Lord, will judge all men according to their works, according to the desire of their hearts.

Doctrine and Covenants 137:7-9

King Benjamin taught that the Savior’s blood atones for those “who have died not knowing the will of God concerning them, or who have ignorantly sinned” (Mosiah 3:11). Abinadi affirmed the same principle. The first resurrection, he said, includes those “that have died before Christ came, in their ignorance, not having salvation declared unto them” (Mosiah 15:24). And the prophet Alma explained that we will be judged according to our works and the desires of our hearts. (See Alma 41:3-6.)

Sister Tania Runia illustrated how this principle applies to each of us by comparing our earthly experience with a diving competition, in which judges consider not only the quality of the performance but also the “degree of difficulty” of the dive being attempted. Sister Runia explained:

Everyone is diving with their own degree of difficulty. And your Savior is the only one who truly knows the difficulty you are diving with.

“Your Repentance Doesn’t Burden Jesus Christ; It Brightens His Joy,” April 2025 general conference

Immediately after Sister Runia’s talk, Bishop Gérald Caussé taught the same principle by sharing the following quotations:

• Neal A. Maxwell: “God … takes into merciful account not only our desires and our performance, but also the degrees of difficulty which our varied circumstances impose upon us” (“According to the Desire of [Our] Hearts,” October 1996 general conference).
• Dallin H. Oaks: “We will be blessed for the righteous desires of our hearts even though some outside circumstance has made it impossible for us to carry those desires into action” (“The Desires of Our Hearts,” Brigham Young University Devotional Address, 8 October 1985).

(See “Compensating Blessings,” April 2025 general conference.)

What is the practical implication for us? We need to focus on what we can control and leave the rest to God. We all have things that we wish we could change but which are outside of our span of influence. God recognizes those good desires and doesn’t expect us to do more than we can.

Full-time missionaries receive the following guidance: “Your success as a missionary is determined primarily by your desire and commitment to find, teach, baptize, and confirm converts and to help them become faithful disciples of Christ and members of His Church. … Your success does not depend on how others choose to respond to you, to your invitations, or to your sincere acts of kindness” (Preach My Gospel, Chapter 1: Fulfill Your Missionary Purpose).

And Church leaders are taught: “Your success as a leader is measured primarily by your commitment to helping God’s children become faithful disciples of Jesus Christ” (General Handbook: Serving in The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, 4. Leadership and Councils in the Church of Jesus Christ).

Today, I will focus my efforts on what I can control. When my sincere efforts don’t yield the desired results, I will remember that God accounts for the degree of difficulty I face and judges me according to the desires of my heart.