Stay by the Tree

In Lehi’s dream, after he tasted a fruit which filled his soul with joy, his immediate desire was to share it with his family. Joys are meant to be shared.

Looking around, he saw them standing beside a river. “I beckoned unto them,” he said, “and I also did say unto them with a loud voice that they should come unto me, and partake of the fruit, which was desirable above all other fruit” (1 Nephi 8:15).

Some of them accepted his invitation, and some did not. He felt sorrow that his sons Laman and Lemuel refused to taste the fruit, but he didn’t abandon the tree. He continued to model for them the behavior that he hoped they would adopt.

Sister Tamara W. Runia learned an important lesson from her father. As a teenager, she made decisions her parents didn’t approve of, but her father always believed in her. “Dad exemplified Lehi’s dream,” she said. “Like Lehi, he knew that you don’t chase after your loved ones who feel lost.” Then, she quoted the following advice from Ronald E. Bartholomew, a retired instructor from the Utah Valley Institute of Religion:

You stay where you are and call them. You go to the tree, stay at the tree, keep eating the fruit and, with a smile on your face, continue to beckon to those you love and show by example that eating the fruit is a happy thing!

“Seeing God’s Family through the Overview Lens,” General Conference, October 2023

We can’t force anyone to feel the love of God. All we can do is show them how that love brings us joy and invite them to do the things that have helped us to experience that joy.

President Russell M. Nelson taught a similar lesson, using a river rafting experience as an example. As his family traveled down the Colorado River through the Grand Canyon, they passed through several dangerous rapids. As they crossed one early in their journey, he tried to hold his 7-year-old daughter to keep her safe. As a result, he was thrown from the raft and nearly died. Thereafter, he held tightly to the rope and instructed his daughter to hold tightly to him. Here is the lesson he learned from that experience:

As we go through life, even through very rough waters, a father’s instinctive impulse to cling tightly to his wife or to his children may not be the best way to accomplish his objective. Instead, if he will lovingly cling to the Savior and the iron rod of the gospel, his family will want to cling to him and to the Savior.

“‘Set in Order Thy House,'” General Conference, October 2001

Elder Kevin W. Pearson taught, “Lehi’s message is to stay by the tree…. True disciples continue to awaken unto God each day in meaningful personal prayer, earnest scripture study, personal obedience, and selfless service. Stay by the tree and stay awake” (“Stay by the Tree,” General Conference, April 2015).

Today, I will stay by the tree. I will continue to participate in habits that keep me close to the Savior, and I will encourage family members to do the same, trusting that they will also find the joy that I have found in the gospel.